I’ve been sending out invitations for my wedding taking place in July of this year. As a communications’ professional, this is one of the most exciting parts of planning a wedding – the actual formal communication of this incredible day for which my Fiancé and I are busy planning.
Over the weekend, a telemarketer (hello duct cleaning!) used caller ID spoofing software to robocall thousands of people using my parents’ home phone number. Many of these people have been calling back to ask why we called them. Some of them angry. Understandably so. We’ve received thousands of calls since Saturday, and have had to unplug the phone line or lose our minds due to incessant ringing.
Here’s the thing: My parents’ home phone number is one of the ways to RSVP for the wedding. We’ve sent out 90 invitations. With. That. Phone. Number.
Needless to say, I was a little frantic when this first happened. There was a lot of rage anger, particularly about why this happened to begin with (I’ll save that for another day). It created a lot of tension, and my imagination went down many paths of crazy. We’re not going to get our RSVP numbers right and that’s going to ruin EVERYTHING! Even though there’s also an email address on the invitation to RSVP. OMG we’re going to have to change the phone number and that’s so much work I don’t have time for, and then, what if the telemarketer gets the new number and does this all over again?!? True story we have to change the phone number, but the other part? Really, Fazeena? I worked so hard on planning this wedding, and this is so unfair! Yup… shit happens.
Spending time at Motel Crazytown
While the first couple of days of this experience were incredibly frustrating and filled with rage anger, I realized (with some awesome listening and advice from the Fiancé) that staying in this space was using up too much of my energy. And when you’re planning a wedding, buying a house and building a business, energy can very often be stretched.
It’s necessary to feel emotions to process experiences in a healthy way or we risk creating energy blocks that lead to other issues. BUT we reach a point where it becomes necessary to recognize the messages playing in our minds and to ask whether those messages are fueling our emotions in a way that help us forward or keep us stuck. We can take it a step further and ask what the fears behind the messages are to begin with. That inquiry alone will start to create a shift.
Contraction or expansion?
We always have a choice. We can choose to think and act from a place of contraction (fear) – RSVP numbers will be off and it’s going to be a disaster! Or we can choose to think and act from a place of expansion (love) – Yes, we have to call a lot of people, but hey, I haven’t talked to them in a while, so we get to connect, and perhaps we’ll get the RSVP numbers quicker than we expected. Which one sounds better? Lighter? More joyful?
Motel Crazytown was good for the first 48, but it began to feel gross and dingy, so I checked out and decided on the expansive route. It’s not ideal, but it’s the current situation, and it’ll be OK.
That’s the thing with perspective. We can choose at any moment to shift. Two days ago, I was livid. Today, I’m finding the situation mildly funny. The power is in the choice. What perspective will you choose?
How has a change in perspective helped you in past situations? Share your experience below.